"her poor will I satisfy with food."

"I will bless her with abundant provisions; her poor will I satisfy with food."  Psalm 132:15

As I sit here at almost 3:00 AM thinking about our trip to Haiti and worrying about everything I might forget, I am reminded that the first missionaries were told by Jesus "Take nothing for the journey except a staff--no bread, no bag, no money in your belts.  Wear sandals but not an extra tunic."  As Americans we feel as if we need to take everything except the kitchen sink with us when we go serve overseas.  It would inconvenience us too much to go without our comfy clothes, soft pillows and rugged shoes.  Can I live without 4 bottles of sunscreen?  One for each SPF level in existence?  How will I survive without my Smart Phone, computer and hair straightener?  Can I live a week without having control over what I will eat for dinner or where I will sleep?

I think of how the disciples went out...with no food, extra clothing or money with only the clothes on their backs and the sandals on their feet and I think of how selfish I am and just how privileged Americans really are.  Then I think about the children of Haiti and the ones that aren't fortunate enough to have even one pair of shoes not to mention 5!  Or the mother that brought her 18 month old daughter to the clinic a few weeks ago that weighed only 12 lbs and loved her so much that she was trying to feed her and a younger sibling on breast milk alone!  She loved her so much that she sent her to an orphanage that had food so that her beautiful daughter could survive.   Then there are the 600,000 people still living in tent cities after the massive earthquake of January, 2010.  They have no running water, no electricity and one woman I just read about said this "I don't even pray anymore because I'm so discouraged."  She has given up on the One person that can bring her out of spiritual poverty,  God.  That saddens my heart to the core.

So, as I pack my bags for this trip to Haiti will I heed the words of Jesus and travel with nothing except the clothes on my back?  Probably not.  I am too spoiled and pampered for that.  But I will look at how I am packing and also how closely I hold my possessions.  Am I holding them that closely that I will not be able to live without a few things for a week?  Do I really look at and feel the hunger pangs of that 18 month old or even try to understand the woman, who's name is Norgilus, that cannot even pray anymore because of her desperate condition?  God has been asking me to start to let go of "things".  To start to hold everything loosely.  He has provided abundant provisions for me and I pray each day that the poor are satisfied with food as Psalm 132:15 promises.  I feel like the most blessed woman on earth today and some day I pray that Norgilus feels this same way too....

Jackie